Showing posts with label Halloween. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Halloween. Show all posts

Friday, October 31, 2025

The Answer Might Scare You [RANT]

It’s been a week. Internal struggles abound. External struggles always seem to join up when that happens. Throw in some cute kids and it’s a wild ride. 

Had some communication lapses on Saturday and thought my girls were going to disown me and request a new model. We were supposed to get together with one of their friends but lunchtime passed and we neither saw nor heard from them, so I double checked and we hadn’t committed to anything. It turned out it was a difference in perceptions of lunchtime combined with a project taking longer than anticipated. Three happy kids and three entertained adults resulted.


Sunday brought more child adorableness. In my church, we have a program where the children sing and share thoughts about God at least once a year. This Sunday was the happy day. Quick highlights:


Tiny humans signing while singing some of the songs.


Nervous human babies looking like they need snuggles because stage fright is real and receiving those snuggles.


My daughter perking up when she realized mama was watching her.


The two girls taller than me towering over the tiny four year olds.


My friends’ son lip-syncing with the most amusing expressions on his face.


My daughter, right behind him, using her Scooby jacket as a puppet.


Almost shaking loose a suppressed giggle over this impromptu vaudeville show.


Songs in tiny voices.


The rest of the week has been spent in contemplating life, the universe, and everything. I may have shared some of my aggravations with more people than I should have. One of my friends sent me books to help me process. Not sure the books all apply to the situation at hand. But what do I know, I only think about my problems to the exclusion of sleep and fight battles for longer than most people would bother. Sometimes, it works out. Sometimes, it clearly isn’t going to.


However, I have confirmation that some of my thought processes are definitely not flawed. Now, we just see if the right people hear what I have to say and choose to be in this with me, right?


Life isn’t meant to be lived alone. Why else would we be born into families? And if your family falls short, choose more family. Pick and choose sisters and brothers from your friends. And if you need extra supervision and guidance, choose more family. Though my biological mother has passed, I currently have five moms listed in my phone. And I pull people into my family conglomeration from time to time because we need each other. I want to thank those who are willing to deal with being part of my family. I apologize if I overstep. We’ll just have to work on our communication. Just be patient with me.


Anyway, I doubled down on adorable today by attending a parade at my children’s school. Kids in each grade level dressed as storybook characters, idioms, or famous people. I saw so many Amelia Earharts and Taylor Swifts, flying pigs and raining cats and dogs, and Waldos everywhere. I also saw so many other adorable creatures and people. 


I started snapping pictures of every kid I knew. With the sun shining on me and people milling about, I figured I might get a good photo for a friend even if some of my pictures only included a wing of one child or a hint of skirt of the other. Hopefully, my offerings bring happiness.


And now to accomplish other tasks before walking my tiny clones around to claim candy and bring joy. Hopefully, substack gets a new post today, too. I have been working on it, but it doesn’t quite feel ready for public consumption yet.

Friday, October 17, 2025

Scary Things Are Brewing [RANT]

While I hung out in the FamilySearch Center on Saturday, the rest of the troops got to work on Halloween decorations. Thus I got to see one of my tiny humans apparently hefting a body on my doorbell cam. Still giggling.

Of course, on my way to the center, I almost became a corpse myself. Two separate individuals thought switching lanes abruptly in near bumper to bumper traffic would be prudent. Pretty sure neither got to their destination quicker. Thankfully, my reflexes and lack of faith in the sanity of other drivers kept me from deserting my faithful readers and “to do” pile.


Sunday brought the expected level of peace as it started with church. Aside from one child flooding the bathroom, bringing out my inner janitor, I enjoyed time with my church family. Then we went to hang out with some friends.


Despite getting reassurance from our host that his oven was functional, it poured out an amazing amount of smoke during the preheat cycle. Then I was left to my own devices without having to claim the kitchen. Of course, this means I felt like a burglar as I opened most cabinets and drawers in search of pans, utensils, and other cooking needs. If only it were that easy to be left alone at my house. My youngest has taken to rolling toys under my feet when I am dancing around between the stove, counter, pantry, and fridge. So if I suddenly stop posting, you might want to check the hospital and sneak me in some food. 


Anyway, we all survived and I didn’t burn down anyone’s house. I did make an adorable four year old happy by cutting a horse silhouette into his pumpkin. I also brought the same kind of joy to a seven year old by not cutting out the face for her jack-o-lantern. 


This week continued at a steady pace until yesterday. My kids get a lot of days off, so I get to entertain them for four days straight. I might be more excited about this than they are. This might be because one refuses to do her homework, so mama isn’t turning on the television and letting them rot their brains. They also keep complaining that they hurt themselves by tripping over the obstacle course they created and then whining more when I offer the tried and true solution of, “Clean up your stuff.”


Even if my kids don’t love me, random strangers do. I have had two individuals on different platforms start chatting with me out of the blue. Because I didn’t immediately tell them to play in traffic without a car, both seem to have reached the conclusion that I don’t store a brain in my head. One invited me to have coffee with them if I ever travel across the country for the inconvenience of a “wrong number”. The other seems to be trying to sweet talk me in French. Yes, I will type to you in French, albeit slowly since I haven’t kept my skills up, and, yes, I will catch the nuance of the French version of, “Your profile picture is so beautiful that I just had to talk to you.” I have heard this before. I am not impressed. Ugh. Anyone know how to negate the aura of “looking to be scammed” that seems to linger around me?


Anyway, I need to work on writing some fiction pieces, so enjoy this little snippet of sleep-inducing wildness. Type at you soon.

Friday, October 10, 2025

Did You See It? [RANT]

I posted a much longer story this week? Are you one of the two people who saw the opening paragraphs? Still no paid subscribers, so only I got the full story. I guess you know what to buy yourself for Christmas and it can count as a gift to me and my little humans. Hint. Hint.

I also spent a solid nine and a half hours watching General Conference. With the passing of President Russell M. Nelson, some speakers were more somber than normal, but they still doled out some good advice. And a couple of them even made me giggle. That may be more on me than the speakers, however. 

I went to the dentist for the fourth time in four weeks. I am thinking I might want to take my observations on oral hygiene to a standup venue instead of making the hygienist giggle as she tries to extract bits of pop tart from my child’s teeth. I promise I told her to brush after breakfast. I also assure you that I don’t think her heart was in brushing the ones she wants to keep. Now I want to brush again…

But first, I remind you that Halloween is coming. It feels like it has snuck up on me fast. Luckily, I have a collection of costumes, so I can just decide on the fly what to be, but not everyone shares my neurosis and costume hoarding skills. 

Yesterday, I ventured to the eye doctor. Unlike last year, they didn’t outright call me old, so that was a win. I did get my eyes dilated, which added a level of excitement to the day. I am not sure if it was the drops for numbing or the dilation drops but something strongly disagreed with my eyes. I did get up on my personal stand-up stage and crack some jokes about looking like I was high, however. If you know me, you know I have resisted many attempts to get me to actually enter that state. I am perfectly disturbingly weird without help. Thank you very much.

Hope you have fun plans for the weekend. Maybe a haunted house? Man, I need to find people who appreciate people trying to scare bodily fluids out of them to wander darkened halls with me. My family is too sweet to be scared. Daw!

Friday, October 18, 2024

Halloween Poetry

I know, dear readers, I am having an existential crisis about the novel I have been sharing here. It might need reworked from the ground up. In the meantime, I offer you these small tokens of appreciation to amuse you. Thank goodness for poetry writing prompts and the inspiration of spooky season.


Haunted House


This house haunts me

Quakes and grows 

It worships, vaunts me

But no one knows

How its walls

Squeeze my heart

How its calls

Tear me apart

I seek it and only find

Tarnished memories, left behind

So how can a house haunt still

When it has no walls to fill?


Housed Haunt


Give me walls, well-remembered

Familiar hearth, warm embers

For no body clothes this soul 

Years unrestrained, terrible toll 

But I’d pay it to watch still

Though some say it will

Haunt me even as I haunt these halls

And keep me locked within these walls

Yet at home I will ever be

As long as none vanquish me


Back to Snack


Red drops 

Heart pops

Sweet treat

Slow feet

Love this 

Vamp kiss

My snack

Fights back

But I

Deny

Release

Fights cease

Accept

Inept

Human

I can

Snack now

See how

Friday, July 19, 2024

Chapter 16: Nurture

Chapter 1: Nature
Chapter 2: Nurture
Chapter 3: Nurture
Chapter 4: Nurture
Chapter 5: Nature
Chapter 6: Nurture
Chapter 7: Nurture
Chapter 8: Nurture
Chapter 9: Nurture
Chapter 10: Nature
Chapter 11: Nature
Chapter 12: Nurture
Chapter 13: Nurture
Chapter 14: Nature
Chapter 15: Nurture

Moving into the apartment increased our number of neighbors exponentially. Our old house sat far enough away from the next on on either side that accidentally bumping into our neighbors required work. In a multi story apartment building, neighbors live on top of each other. Maggie and I loved it. Father immersed himself in work and remained oblivious to the change in environment. Mother seemed to feel the weight of our neighbors on her back. 


While we examined door decor for hints as to which apartment would prove most profitable for trick-or-treating on Halloween night, mother tried to hurry us along to avoid inadvertent interactions. Father would be taking us around our new “neighborhood” later, so that she wouldn’t be subjected to the culture shock. I couldn’t hide my excitement to get to know more of the people I could hear in the halls and whose meals left a lingering and intriguing aromas in the halls.


“Are you sure about this costume?” Mother pouted, holding up the devil costume Maggie insisted on at the store. She put it down to show her the fairy costume she preferred. “Or would you like lovely wings like Sissy?”


Maggie crossed her arms, pouted, and tapped her foot. This was at least the twentieth time someone had asked that question, but she refused to be swayed. I particularly enjoyed swaying at that point because I had my wings on already. I loved the way they brushed my head and back as they moved. And the genius who designed them had added little bells so a tinkling choir sang for me every time I moved.


Maggie smiled as the bells went off again, but then directed a frosty look at our mother and firmly declared, “Devil.”


Mother hesitated, so Maggie lunged toward her preferred costume. She tackled it with skill worthy of the NFL. Before any protests could be voiced, she wrestled the one piece suit over the clothing she already wore. The headband hung askew after she wrestled it into place, but she grinned at us proudly.


“Twick ow Tweat!” She declared proudly.


We had both been practicing the night’s catchphrase for over a week, but she was still far from mastering the r sound. Mother and I couldn’t help but smile. Her mispronunciation and enthusiasm added to the charm of  her masquerading as a devil as blond curls framed an angelic face. She blinked her bright blue eyes at us—the picture of innocence.


“Well, you are adorable,” mother conceded and handed us each a sturdy orange bag featuring a Jack-o-lantern face leering back at us. “Stay together. Stay with your father. I’ll see you when you get back.”


“We’ll bring you something nice,” Father leaned in to kiss her forehead.


“We don’t live in a place that gives out high end candy for the kids to share with their parents anymore,” she lamented.


“Maybe they’ll surprise us.”


Mother’s half-hearted, “Maybe,” didn’t even try to sound enthusiastic as she placed a witch hat on her head to wait for trick or treaters. 


As we followed him closely to the first door, Father turned around and knelt in front of us, “Want to help me make mama’s night?”


We nodded enthusiastically. He grinned and reached into his pocket. He produced two full size chocolate bars from mama’s favorite brand. He tucked her favorite into my bag and her least favorite into Maggie’s.


“Now those are for mama, but tell her one of the neighbors gave them to you, okay?” We nodded understanding, but we wouldn’t have thought to tell her anything else.


As we knocked on doors, our bags grew heavier and heavier. So did our memories. Our new neighbors reveled in meeting us, sharing their names and little tidbits about themselves.


“I’m Joan. I do flower arrangements and corsages. You know for daddy daughter dances or date night with the wife.”


“I’m Wanda. My girls used to have blond curls like that but now they have dark hair like me.”


“An angel and a devil? I’m Carl and this requires a photo opp… Can I see your phone? You girls stand back there on either side of the hall. A little further back. Closer together. Perfect. What do you think?”


We raced forward to see the photo and collided with each other. When father finished untangling us and scooping spilled candy back into bags, Carl handed over the phone. We giggled. Our new friend had positioned us perfectly, so devil Maggie and angel Opera stood perfectly on our father’s shoulders.


“So you’re a photographer,” father deduced.


“Yes, I am, and I have something special for such charming models and their father,” he reached into his candy bowl and pulled out three of mother’s absolute favorite candy bars, “you have a nice night and a Happy Halloween.”


“Oh. We will,” I peeked into my bag, now more excited to go home and see mother than before.


Father nodded his agreement as the door closed. He even raised a hand to his eye. At that time, I still believed daddy’s don’t cry, so I briefly wondered what he was wiping away. Then he grabbed Maggie’s hand. Usually, she and I are inseparable, so they started down the stairs confident I was only steps behind them.


I should have been right behind them, but as I stepped forward, my left wing jerked oddly. I stopped to try to fix it, but nothing I did helped. I gave up and rushed to the stairs. The hallway before me stood empty except for a few skinny zombies and witches, clinging to doorframes. As I gazed up the hallway in confusion.


“Father? Maggie?”


A doorway further down the hall clicked open. I breathed a sigh of relief. That must be them. But a woman with dark eyes and dark hair and the most perfect face I had ever beheld stepped out of the apartment. We stared at each other. My eyes held wonder. Her eyes wondered who I was and why I stood alone in that hallway. 


She slung her purse over her shoulder  and offered me a reassuring smile. My mouth dropped open. I tried to keep it closed but that already perfect face became beyond perfection when she smiled. I wanted to be that beautiful, right then, because angels had that kind of beauty. As my mind processed this in the slow way that a child’s mind works sometimes, my mouth remained open. She looked over her shoulder to reassure herself no one else had stepped into the hall. Then she cautiously stepped toward me with one dark hand extended like one might approach a feral cat.


When she got within a few feet, she stopped. She got down to my level, executing a squat in high heels with more grace than most of us can master it in cross trainers.


“I’m Mandy,” she pointed to her heart with her thumb as a soft melodious voice filled the air with her musical words, “I don’t think we have met.”


I nodded agreement. She searched her thoughts for a better question.


“Do you live here?” I nodded again.


“Do you know where your apartment is?” I shook my head at this and the smile completely disappeared.


A cheer erupted from the door to my right. We both turned toward it. The smile returned as her face brightened.


“Did you lose your parents while trick-or-treating?”


A nod from me and her improved mood loosened my tongue, “I’m Opera.”


“That’s a lovely name. And I think I can help you, Opera.”


“You can?”


“Yes. As you can hear,” she pauses for another uproarious cheer from behind the closed door, “The Haymonds throw a big party every year. If you knock on their door, they just pull you in. It is almost impossible to get out again because no one can hear how good your reason is to get out—even if you are looking for your daughter.”


I nodded understanding, so she continued, “Now I have to run out and grab more candy for when you knock on my door, so I can’t go into the party, but if you knock on the door, they will help you find your folks, okay?”


I nodded agreement and stepped toward the door, but she gently placed her hand on my shoulder, “Before you do that, I think I can help you with one more thing. Hold still.”


I obeyed, standing still as soldier while she adjusted something on my wings. I felt the straps pull a couple of times and then nothing.


“How does that feel?” She asked.


I shook my wings. They tinkled beautifully. They pulled just right—neither to the left nor the right. They didn’t pinch or poke. I looked up at my newly minted guardian angel and offered one emphatic word.


“Perfect.”


“Good. Now I am going to stand over here. When you see your folks, give me a thumbs up. If you don’t see them, a thumbs down will let me know to come rescue you. Ready?”


I nodded and knocked loudly on the door. It swung open almost immediately. An older gentleman with vampire teeth and blood dripping down his chin looked right over me.


“Mandy? How did you knock from way over there? Come on in. Muhahaha. Vou know you are always velvome here.”


She smiled and pointed down where I was avidly searching the crowd for any sign of my father. I had no trouble spotting him as he had hoisted Maggie up on his shoulders. He seemed to be trying to navigate through the crowd, but every person he came near stopped him to coo over Maggie. As she wailed until her face turned beet red, they tried to comfort her. Then she glanced toward the door, perhaps, hoping for egress and found what she really wanted. Her wails changed to something different. Even from my vantage point, I could make out her one word scream. 


“Sissy! Sissy! Sissy!”


She reached her arms toward me and father turned to face the door. Relief flooded over him and tension seeped out of his shoulders. My attention returned to the vampire before me who bent over so his face hovered inches from my face.


“You know we have a devil in here. I think an angel would even the odds.”


“Yes, sir,” I said politely, turning to give Mandy a thumbs up.


She smiled at me and turned away but not before offering me a finger wave. I waved back. Then four arms encircled me.


“Sissy, I’m so sorry,” Father said in a rush, “I thought you were right there and then this nice man opened the door and pulled us in. I realized immediately that you weren’t with us, but I just couldn’t see, to get back to the door.”


“Our parties are like that, but they are so much fun,” a female vampire joined us in the doorway.


An aroma of rubbing alcohol and grape juice emanated from her as leaned in to peer at first me and then my sister. “My goodness. You both look like angels, but I think this one in red here wouldn’t turn her nose down so much at how much we love to party.”


She took a swig from her glass as her husband leaned in to whisper in her ear. She frowned at him for a moment, then cast a look at us and softened up.


“Let me get you kids some treat bags and let you get back to trick-or-treating. My husband, the expert on childhood since he is in his second one, has reminded me of the importance of this night.”


She returned a moment later with paper bags overflowing with goodies. They filled up about a quarter of our bags all on their own. She offered my father her hand. He shook it tentatively and she laughed.


“Don’t look so scared. I really don’t bite. It was nice to meet you, James. We should have you and the missus and the girls over for dinner sometime.”


“That sounds lovely. I will have Livie get in touch with you.”


“Yep. We’re in the directory.”


With a few more prolonged goodbyes, particularly from Maggie’s new fan club at the party, father made sure he firmly grabbed each of us by the hand and led us down the hallway. As we reached the last door before Mandy’s, she stepped out onto the landing, clutching a large paper bag to her chest as she fumbled with her keys. She winked at me as she disappeared into her apartment. Her neighbor didn’t answer, which I had assumed from their lack of decorations, so we moved on to her door.


We knocked. Giggles erupted inside. The door slowly creaked open, though I am pretty sure someone inside made the noise. Then Mandy opened the door with a purple witch hat on her head. She was joined by a duplicate with a green hat.


“Hello, new neighbors,” they paused to cackle, “We’re Mandy and Candy and we want to cast a spell on you, so…”


They each produced a small plastic cauldron overflowing with goodies. Mandy dropped one in Opera’s bag with another conspiratorial wink and Candy dropped the other in Maggie’s bag.


“You’re the cutest little devil I’ve ever seen.” She giggled.


“And we’re witches, so that’s saying something.” Mandy added as she reached for something on a small table near the door.


Her hand returned to view with a tray of sugar cookies, decorated to look like cats and bats and eclectic pumpkins. “We’ve been meaning to introduce ourselves to our new neighbors. If I am not mistaken, your apartment is directly over ours.”


Father looked up and down the hallway for a moment, “I think you’re right. I hope we haven’t been too loud.”


“Not at all. They have wonderful sound dampeners in this place,” though her eyes crinkled a little bit with the lie, “We actually wondered if you had moved in yet.”


“Oh yeah. All moved in. We just haven’t got a chance to introduce ourselves to anyone. Busy, you know?” He gestured toward Maggie and I.


“Yes. You have to keep an eye on those little ones,” another wink flew my way.


This time father glanced between us curiously, “Have you two met?”


“A few minutes ago in the hallway,” she said, “While you were trapped in the party. We love the Haymonds until we want to come home and sleep.”


“I got that feeling myself.”


They wrapped up with more thank yous and holiday wishes and slowly closed the door. I peered into my bag. Maggie peered into hers and then into mine. Her eyes locked on my face as if trying to read my mind. 


“My bag is getting heavy,” I took a sideways glance at Maggie who had gently let hers drop to the ground after inspecting its contents.


“There are a couple more floors,” father offered though a look of relief crossed his face, “But we can go home and surprise mommy.”


“With cookies,” Maggie declared joyously, lifting the straps of her bag up as high as she could without actually lifting the bag off the ground.


Father laughed, “Yes, with cookies. Let me take that for you.” He glanced at me but I hefted my own bag.


“I’m a big girl,” I declared.


“Well, daddy is tired, so maybe we should take the elevator,” now he winked at me, but who was I to argue with adult wisdom.


Soon we were home with our abundance of treats. On par with tradition, we dumped both bags on the table and started sorting through them. My mother seemed excited that the cauldron contained mostly small toys and a couple Reese’s cups.


“Like they were made just for our girls,” she whispered to father as we started playing with the toys.


“It’s a snake,” Maggie shoved a fidget toy made of links that twisted this way and that into my face. 


We both giggled. Despite being distracted by our toys, we each kept one eye on mother as they sorted through the candy. Anything with coconut went in dad’s pile, along with anything we currently deemed weird. To this day, I still refuse to try a zero bar. Why is it white? Is zero the rating it got from the first people who tasted it? I’m not brave enough to figure it out, but father likes them.


Then the first of the expensive candy bars got unearthed. Mother stared at the gilded wrapper like it contained actual gold.


“Really? Someone gave out my favorites?”


Father shrugged, “Must have.”


They kept sorting. All told, we found nine candy bars just for her. She sat back in her chair, tears streaming down her face.


“Maybe you aren’t just an optimist, James. This place might not be so bad.”


As she opened up one of the candy bars and broke off sections for each of us, father regaled her with stories of our new friends. She seemed more fascinated with the Haymonds than Candy and Mandy. Maybe she had met duplicate people before. They are the first twins I ever remember meeting, so they seemed so much more interesting than hard partying vampires.


Chapter 17: Nature