Sleep Lessons? [RANT]

This week convinced me that I need sleep lessons. My Covid-induced allergies returned and brought random nighttime coughing with them. Sleep deprivation kept me from realizing this was the culprit until the fourth time I woke up coughing up a lung on day two or three. Honestly, I thought the exhaustion stemmed from not enough protein and waking up at the slightest sound since I have a child who likes to sneak around like an elephant learning to walk at all hours of the night. Reminds me of the cat I stole who thought she could hide behind a shoe.

Anyway, I decided to help my now confused nasal passages move along by using  the Flonase my doctor prescribed. That halved the late night coughing sessions but loosened something up, so I thought I was going to die. No idea how people live with allergies. It has been throwing off my groove.

Needless to say, I have been wandering around in a fog, wishing for sleep and saying weird things. So when the teachers share weird stuff that my kids say about chocolate, I will only have myself to blame. Anyone else anxiously waiting for someone else to entertain their kids since they have been given a less than stellar rating by those sweet little critics?

Another critic gave me the grocery store version of a standing ovation yesterday. As I wandered around in search of yummies to keep the household happy, I rounded a corner at a probably inappropriate speed. I tend to get a little excited toward the end of my shopping journey, so I don’t always remember to slow down going around corners. As I sped into the next aisle, a man looked up startled. His eyes focused on my face and widened as a smiled in that way I do when I see a particularly lovely cheesecake or cake or cookie or green muppet. I smiled in acknowledgement and continued on my quest for frozen pizza. (My elephant has an addiction and I’m her dealer.)

I was quite proud of that man for only noticing my face. Of course, the ladies in the check-out line noticed my fancy new shirt, which informs the world that my family tree is full of nuts. True story…and most days, so is my belly.

For those keeping track, I have posted on Substack this week. I am still figuring out the ins and outs of this endeavor. Sadly, I am not writing as much as I should. I need to work on that, so more of you will decide my creative endeavors are worth supporting.

In the meantime, have a great week and remember that you can not hide behind an object smaller than yourself…

Unless you have a cloak of invisibility.

Birthday Bashes [RANT]

Just a reminder that my substack has gone live with paid posts. You can subscribe for free and get all the free posts delivered to your inbox or pay a little and get every post sent to you. I priced the subscription as low as possible and have been posting at least twice a week. Summer has kept me busy, so most posts have been poetry, but I have high hopes to get more short stories out in the fall. In the meantime, wish me a happy birthday by letting me know what strikes your fancy here or there.

My brain keeps refusing to let me sleep until I address its need to write poems about various dark creatures. If I didn’t have an angel on the other shoulder prompting me to write light pieces, I might be concerned. have been posting these sweeter pieces for all subscribers because the world needs more light. I guess that means we pay for darkness. Seems valid.

The rest of the week has been devoted to pre-birthday celebrations. I have eaten cheesecake and Italian food. I have been carefully working through the freebies that find their way into my inbox. I have to get something for letting different places send me propaganda almost daily. 

Even better, my girls continued their camp happiness this week. Yesterday was their last day of camp, so they performed a cute little hula show for us. Of course, my brain thinks it is funny and halfway through a song about “hula hands”, it decided we were singing about Major Hoolihan from “M.A.S.H.”, so I apologize to my husband and friend who were sitting next to me for my snickers. I didn’t limit them to that song as I dropped my phone directly on my face while trying to make video to share later, preferably with shy boyfriends who are already terrified of me.

Clearly, I will not be taking up videography as a job any time soon, but I still think I missed my calling as baker. Luckily, I get to bake cakes for some of my adopt-a-family. I also keep forcing people to eat delicious brownies because otherwise I will eat them all myself. Please don’t let me eat all of the brownies myself. I do not wish to buy new clothes.

Anyway, my birthday swiftly approaches and we’re supposed to be celebrating again today with a little family trip to eat Italian food. Yes, I might be addicted to deliciousness.

Burdens and New Projects [RANT]

As my readers know, I am never short on things to obsess over. Even if it doesn’t happen to be Friday the 13th and I didn’t find a shirt with cats dressed as ghosts to wear in celebration, my life always has a certain bustle to it.

All my mom friends are nodding in understanding right now, particularly those who don’t homeschool their kids. Who doesn’t appreciate teachers more when we find ourselves as the sole providers of entertainment, direction, food, and education all day every day for three months? My daughters benefit from a consistent schedule, so I worked one out in my head. Then I wrote it down on paper. Then I posted it on a dry erase board, so they know what my expectations are? We are on day five of this fun experiment. 

They haven’t fought me as much as I thought they would. I think this is because I give them a whole hour to play outside (if the weather permits) in the morning and then give them ample free time in the afternoon for watching movies and playing. I also outsourced science and social studies to the television because mama needs some time to clean and cook. (No matter how often my husband extols the virtues of our kitchen fairies, the only person I ever see tidying up in there is me and occasionally him putting a dish in the dishwasher with enough enthusiasm to make me feel I should throw a parade.) 

They have, however, started yelling at me if we end or start an activity a minute before or after the posted time. This has made me aware that all of our clocks are on the exact same time. They also get easily off task when daddy pops down for a snack. How dare he be so irresistible?

The Bananarama song “Cruel, Cruel Summer” has been ear worming me this morning. June is determined to make me sad. I was wasting time on Facebook when I should have been sleeping and saw an obituary for a friend of mine. This friend is a decade younger than me and seemed to be getting her life back on track after it got derailed by a divorce. She was reclaiming her life in record time, too, and her resilience is one of the reasons so many loved her. I have seen clickbait posts like this before, so I just closed Facebook and decided to hope for the best until morning.

Morning revealed, that this particular light had indeed gone out. I wasn’t as close to this amazing woman as I would have liked, but her posts tended to bring joy and hope to my life. She was always helping people, bragging about her adorable kids and pups, and sharing her latest ventures. She also shared stories about overcoming a troubled past. Honestly, I hope she knows she is amazing. I hope people don’t forget her stories and that others still find hope in how she overcame addiction.

I know her sister and mother and admire them as well. Along with other her siblings and friends who equate to family, she left three adorable kids behind. I hope they know they will see her again. I hope they know she wishes she would still hold them close and wipe away their tears.

Obviously, I have been trying not to be blubbery and sad this week. I mostly succeeded though I attended a memorial at an ice cream shop the other day and found myself fighting a lump in my throat. Unfortunately, bedtime arrived before the moment of silence, so I didn’t get to participate with others in a moment of silence. That might have been for the best. I would have probably melted myself with tears if I had been able to participate.

Then, this morning, I returned from my walk, which featured a podcast about burdens and how we can carry them better when yoked to someone else, specifically Jesus the Christ, to find out a dear friend had passed. She started out as my boss, but I couldn’t help but think of her as a friend. Her number one rule was “don’t hurt yourself”. She clearly understood the silliness of college students when motivated too carry heavy boxes and huge piles of books around the library.

In more recent years, she has brightened my feed with posts about helping others and her cats. Imagine how much her efforts brightened the lives of others. She supported causes to help assure healthy food for people throughout her community and, of course, the protection of animals. Clearly, she and I are kindred spirits. I just wish we could have shared tomato soup, Chinese food, and French fries a few more times in this life.

Send some positive energy out into the universe for the loved ones of my two friends and make sure you hug your loved ones and appreciate them in the moments we have.

In other news, it looks like this particular page might be more rants than fiction. I’ve moved my fiction to substack, where I intend to start paid subscriptions after I figure out how much would be reasonable to charge for approximately four posts a month. I can’t promise more than that until I shape up and motivate myself better. Think monetary appreciation will do it?

Contemplation [POETRY] + [RANT]

 

Come to me

Let this be

Our moment of sun

Say you’re the one

Whose belief

Offers relief

And catch this

Chaste kiss

Before the fall

That takes all

Before the rise

Phoenix eyes

Feathers aflame

To lay claim

To my name

~~~

So I have been contemplating substack. I have a couple of friends who are already using it to share their work Would that motivate me to follow my own self-appointed deadline of worthwhile content? Would my friends still want to read my ramblings if there was a small fee associated?

If so what would be my focus?

Poetry

Faith

Food

Short stories

I feel like these rants would still reside here . No one wants to miss out on what is on my mind, right? Especially, the other moms who don’t realize how much they did each day until they are lying in bed exhausted and wondering why this hurts and that aches.

This week, I have been procrastinating writing to conquer laundry mountain. My washing machine gave up the spin cycle around Memorial Day and its replacement arrived on Wednesday. Four people plus no washer equals hugs piles of clothes. My new washer is definitely getting a workout this week.

But I have conquered enough that I sat down to update dear readers. Of course, I listened to a talk on charity this morning and decided to mow the front lawn, so my husband has that much less to do. Will he appreciate it? Or take it as his due?

My summer procrastination centers around today being the last day of school for my two lovely clones. I caught up with a few friends over the past couple of weeks because my focus this summer will be trying to keep my babies active and engaged. So wish me luck because it is going to be a fight to convince them we aren’t watching television all summer. No matter how much we want to watch every episode of every 80s cartoon…